Sunday, November 1, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
She is getting destroyed by the hip-hop community. #lilmamais became a trending topic and it changed my life. some of my favorites #lilmamais "havin a hard time getting into jay-z's after party. and master splinter.
Beyonce: The greatest performer of our generation. I think the only person who cares as much about performing is Kanye. he's not on Beyonce's level, but he puts on great shows because his desire is there.
Lady Gaga: Her coming out party. I've been jocking her for some time now, but people got to see that she really is good. Her live singing was amazing, and her performance was an event. Fake killing herself. Genius. Plus she stole the show with her outfits. The red cover face was amazing. i literally cracked up watching for each one of her costumes outfits.
True Blood: The finale was ok but overall it was pretty underwhelming. There were some great cinematic shots (the bull) and character moments (jessica leaving for a night out) but overall, the cliff hanger was weak and the last four episodes of the season felt like someone frantically finishing a paper before turning it in two minutes later.
Big Love: My new show. It's tight. And the intro sequence is impeccable.
The rams: lead the league with the fewest points scored. 0. *sigh* we'll get em next week. (no we won't)
Big Brother: Jordan won HoH. And it was great to see Kevin and Natalie Squirm. She gave Natalie a pass though. Smart for her. But sucks for america. I didn't see who won i flipped over to
Jay Leno: I like his new show. It's the tonight show. It's just earlier. with no desk while he interviews people. But it's good. I hope he continues to dominate.
Wasted: I really like this song by gucci mane. "I don't wear tight jeans like the white boys. But I do get wasted like the white boys." lol
Patriots: T.O. is mad. he should be. Two catches. And as soon as dude decided to return that kick I knew it was a fumble. Plus tom brady seized the moment and once again got to have one of his, smug ass press conferences. He tries to act so nonchalant, but you can see it on his face that he thinks he's the best thing to ever happen. It's like I know you impregnated Bridget Moynahan and Gisele, and won three superbowls, but do you have to be suck a douche about it. #tombradystrikesagain
Til next time. Over and out
Monday, September 14, 2009
Don't get me wrong. It was Taylor Swift's moment. BUT Kanye Was Right. and I'll defend him since no one else will, and here's why:
1. Single ladies is an ICONIC video. Everyone has seen that video. There have been a ton of imitations on youtube and numerous spoofs on a plethora of comedy shows. There's of course the one move where you stick your arms in front and have them go back...you know what I mean. Anyway, there's no way in H*LL that Taylor swift's video has elicited that kind of reaction from the populous.
2. He exposed just how fraudulent the MTV award process really is. How can Single Ladies will for Best Overall Video, but not Best Female video. For real? This ain't a Caster Semenya issue. Beyonce is ALL woman!! So, can a baseball team be ousted in the first round of the playoffs and win the world series? No. It's beyond reason. MTV is simply trying to give as many awards to as many people as possible, because these stars are vain. They want to win awards. And you have to give them awards or else they're much more likely to skip your show or to decline performing which cuts into your revenue. How you gonna market a show with no stars. But it's also because we want to see our favorite stars be rewarded for their work. We want to watch Taylor's moment, and Beyonce's and Lady gaga's.
3. Would we even be talking about the VMA's if it weren't for Kanye? Nope. I mean, there were some good performances. Beyonce killed it (as usual) . Pink did some crazy trapeez shit and Lady Gaga killed it with her performance. And lil mama ran on the stage at the end. (This by the way is aruably the greatest VMA moment ever, but thats for another time) But the VMA's usual ly have great performances. Beyonce destroyed ring the alarm a couple years ago but no one ever really talked about it. (She's probably the greatest performer of our generation, and the only person I would pay over $200 to see perform live but it's just that serious) MTV just got madddd publicity out of all this. People will tune in next year because of what might happen. Yeah, believe it or not, MTV is thrilled about what went down.
4. Beyonce had to know she was going to win that award. Which again proves how rigged this all is. Taylor Swift was told to wait by the side of the stage. So I honestly have no idea who's idea it was to give her a chance to finish her speech. Maybe it was Beyonce, but maybe MTV set it up. It's all too much for me to try and figure out what really happened.
5. You don't give a fuck about Taylor Swift! No one does. 13 year olds do. And they don't stir shit up about how Kanye is the worst person ever. The media does. And if you do give a fuck about Taylor Swift, and you're over 13, YOU'RE A LOSER. Your life has all been a waste. Just quit now. Quick, name a Taylor Swift song. That's what I thought.
6. I think it's mainly because taylor Swift was a white. woman. If Kanye did that to Soulja Boy, people would be like, that was weird. And just move on. They'd pull a beyonce and say "Ohhh, Kanye." (yeah she mouthed it right after he took the mic and it's hilarious.) But people don't like Kanye anyway, I think it's a sucessful, young, COCKY black man that gets them. Yes he is cocky, and he refuses to stay in his place, and unfortunatly that makes people uncomfortable. And Donald Trump needs to shut his bitch ass up about a boycott Becuzzzz
6a. He had two muthafuckin Miss America's either get busted with dope or takin nude pictures. And then he's all "they deserve a second chance, we all make mistakes." Well if that's the case you should be number one on Kanye's support bandwagon. But we see what it's about with Trump. Money rules all. He has nothing to gain financially so all that second chance talk goes out the window. I'll never believe another word out of his mouth. (Unless of course he's going off on Rosie. Best. Rant. Ever!)
7. Here's one. People get upset at Obama because he calls Kanye a Jackass. But wait a minute. You're bashing Kanye just as much as Obama. But now Obama is the bad guy. Naw dawg, you can't have your cake and hate the black guys two. Pick one black guy to hate, and do ya thang. This just shows that they're actively trying to bring down sucessful black men. If you're truly mad at kanye there's no way you jump on Barack. So they're not really mad at Kanye. He snacthed the mic from a white girl, BOOM, let's get him. And finally
8. IT'S A FUCKIN MTV VIDEO MUSIC AWARD. LET ME SAY THAT IN A KANYE-ESQUE ALL CAPS RANT! MTV. VIDEO. MUSIC. AWARD. Not an emmy, not a grammy, not an oscar. The trophy is a fuckin MOONMAN. It's one half step up from that hideous golden popcorn that they reuse every year. (yeah, they don't let them keep that one) The whole thing is a joke. He wasn't in front of congress. Though that Obama Kanye mash-up is hilarious. Listen, I laughed when I saw it. It was funny to me. Why didn't taylor, just say, 'Ok, that's awkward." and then go on thanking people. I mean cmon girl, step yo game up. and with that. I'm done.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
(As far as who i'm pulling for, I dunno. Natalie Looked kinda good, she almost made it to cutie with a booty territory before she blurted out. This one's for Chima! Ugh, so unnatractive....Michelle (left) who looks like a pig sometimes and cute the next is prolly my best bet. The hottest one Jordan (bottom) is Sooooo dumb, she ain't winnin shit and that will be her downfall. We'll see)
So LeGarrette Blount is suspended for a year after getting nice with a Boise football player. I mean, he DROPPED that other dude. watch the video. But for Hoyt, this has got to be embarrassing. I mean he gets hit and goes straight down. No stagger, he just collapses on himself. But real talk for a second. Hoyt comes over and taps blount on the shoulder and says *something*. Now I don't know what he said, but as Robert Smith of ESPN Gameday says, "there's only one word that he could have said" that would make him go. Hmmmm, what word was that? Death-panel. Public-option. No that's only reason to throw in a town hall meeting. Yeah, I'm guessing he called him the N word. Yeah, if so, he deserved to get clocked. Why hasn't Blount called him on it then. He would get a lot more sympathy that way. *as far as it being a sucker punch. I don't think so, If you watch the clip, blount throws the punch almost immediately after Hoyt taps him on the shoulder and talks shit. Rule number 1, If you talk shit, keep your head on a swivel* But Blount may have already burned up any good will by needing to be held back from going int the crowd. And this wasn't a "hold me back" situation, he needed to be held back or that one guy would have been on the wrong end of a (halo voice) Double kill. All that said, he's a senior, I don't think he should be suspended the entire year. He needs a couple of games to prove that he can play football or else he won't be drafted, and I fear he could end up like maurice clarrett.
-sidenote- Greg Paulus sucks. I can't believe the Syracuse high ups ok'd a duke PG to run their offense. He couldn't make the DUKE team. They haven't won a game in about 6 years. They haven't won multiple games in about 30 years. And they decided to pass (no pun intended). His throws are so weak. They are all of the dreaded "floating duck" variety. The next spiral he throws may freak his receiver the fuck out. It looks like he's still on high school football mode. He needs some of that brady quinn protein shake. first time i saw him throw a pass i was like damnnnn, the other qbs must suck. cuz they pulled him straight off the hard wood and gave him the starting job. i'm sure part of it was to sell tickets and get people talking about Syracuse again. but still, he looks ridic...
Thursday, September 3, 2009
So Sandra Bullock is on Conan tonight! And she looks amazing. Ok, so the plan was to wait for Britney Spears to shave her head again and wife her up, BUT, I'mma need to go ahead and swoop on Sandra. I just gotta get past that big dummy Jesse James. And not the one that sings "wanted." can't. stand. her. I think it's official. I may have a type. But as for the power rankings (last weeks rank), here we go. Even one surprise call up from Alias making the cut.
1. Sandra Bullock (2) Her movie comes out tmw
2. Tina Fey (1) Always gonna be my girl.
2. Amanda Bynes(3) She's amazing. Follow her on twitter!
4. Jodie Foster (5) Total lez, but I still love her to death
5. Jessica Simpson (-) Single, Dumb, may be my best shot
6. Jennifer Garner(-) Too many kids. But I'd still holla.
Whoa, big news for my boy..
Michael Vick. Welcome back to the league. Week three! That's what's up. I feel Goodell on not wanting you to be the main storyline going into the start of the season, I mean you did lie to his face, but all in all, you got off EASY! If he really wanted his pound of flesh he could have waited until week six and then suspend you so yup. good job my nigga. Just don't fuck up, because I swear those peta
Well Weeds ended with a bang this season. First of all. Mary Louise-Parker looked GOOD. REALLY GOOD. For the first time in a long time. She got made up real nice. She almost made a run at the power rankings. And without spoiling anything I'm glad that this season was not wasted. Honestly, Season four was garbage, but if you watch season four straight til the end of season 5 it's not that bad. 4 & 5 were essentially an extended season and there were about three solid stand alone episodes between them. Every episode I was like, why am I still watching. Then halfway through this season the threw something out there and I'm like ok. I see you weeds, and then I thought they forgot about it, but they didn't and I'm so happy. I can't wait to see where the series goes from here but hopefully they'll shift the focus back to being a dark comedy and not bland caricature-filled drama. I fucking swear, they were honestly one episode away from blowing it completely. Whew!
Oh man. I saw this today and I fell out because "Autotune the News", got T-Pain to make a cameo. classic. I'll be back to tomorrow to hit on big brother among other things..It got crazy last night, and I'm gonna need a night to process it all.
Friday, August 14, 2009
I have no idea how Vick will be utilized, but I think they'll find an interesting way to have him on the field with Donovan McNabb. And I don't think it'll be in the wildcat formation. Also, those peta degenerates need to get a life. How about people for the ethical treatment of people? Hmmmm, stop worry about trying to get fido better tasting kibbles and bits and worry about getting people health care. Geez....
But the person who BY FAR is happiest about the michael Vick signing is none other than Rick Pitino. Don't think I've forgotten about you. Having sex in a restaurant, at a table, while your assistant is passed out a few feet away. WITHOUT A RUBBER! That's the real crime. Cmon man.....Focus. Adultery is an art form. Poor style Pitino.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Now, let's move away from the other managers and call out the fucking gutless assholes that have been killing my team.
KEVIN GREGG- Occupation: Professional Dick rider/ Closer / Dream Killer- In the last week he has an ERA of 20. He threw two pitches sunday both of which were launched a combined 847 feet in a ridculously empty ballpark.
BJ UPTON: Occupation: Slut/ Center fielder / Cock Tease - A slut/cock tease may seem like a natural contradiction, but let me explain. This muthafucka is ranked 16 overall. and isn't doing shit. He has no power. He refuses to run. And his average is around the .240 mark. What really pisses me off is that I've had him 2 years in a row and he's fucked me twice. I bet next year he hits 50 HRs and steals 100 bases, because he is such A fucking CUM DUMPSTER. You could call him a young Mariah Carey. And speaking of Jizzhounds.
CARLOS LEE: Occupation: Cum connoisseur(num num num)/ Left Fielder /? - Carlos has picked it up lately. But a jizz junky is always 1 hard dick away from falling off the wagon. I'm tired of his bullshit. He follows up 5 RBI games with 0-4 stinkers. My goodness.
Well that was cathartic
Monday, July 27, 2009
Justin Bieber..WHO in the BLUE Hell ARE YOU!!?? This wanna be rapper/singer/wanksta fuckin pisses me off. I don't like Asher Roth anyway. But he did his shit on I love college. (Allen Iversohhhn, Hakeem Olajuwonnnn)The rest of his shit is wack, no doubt. But he's not tryna be a gangsta, so respect. But this lil muhfucka was tryna act all hard in the video. Well you know what. FUCK HIM! and fuck the muthafuckas who think I'mma even illegal download his garbage. I've flushed turds that have come out lookin meaner than him. whatever. I'm over it.
Meryl Streep sucked on the tonight show. She is not funny. and she is not cute. She is just a talented actress that is awkwardly unflattering to the eyes.
Update: In 2009, Diddy is poised to release his best album.....ever.
Ok Diddy. *rolls eyes* So basically Diddy has to decided to make an album with more than one single. I must say, I do like making his band, or at least the music they play during the auditions. Here's my question, If Diddy worked for himself. Would he be fired? Because it seems like he keeps churning out wack albums. I honestly have no idea. NO IDEA. how Diddy manages not to end up like Hammer.
I have a second date!!! I'm excited, and she's more awkward and shy than I am so I am sittin pretty. Only bad thing is we're going to the baseball game tmw and it's supposed to rain. I hope not, but either way, we should have a good time. Oh! So here's one, we were at a friends house the other day and a game of never have I ever broke out. So all of a sudden she gets super shy...She won't keep her fingers up and pretty much tries to hide. I'm wondering if that's how she acts, or if it was for my benefit. I dunno, but she wasn't shy when she was grabbing her tits during a game of thunder. It's funny how the closet freak in a girl can just show itself out of nowhere. Well, tmw I should start to get to the bottom of what she's all about
Oh man, I can't wait for Big Brother 11 tmw!!! This season, is shaping up to be another classic. And there's not even a black guy so I have no idea how they're doing it. Jesse and his, poor me, the girls all love me thing is getting old. and why was he always shity with Laura? He pretty much forced her out of the house, because Ronnie has no balls and is taking it in the ass from the atletes. But score one for Laura in exposing him to the group. Lame Ronnie, Lame....I'm gonna miss laura and her big ass titties. moment of silence please for Ms. Laura Crosby
Monday, July 6, 2009
I just saw a commercial for the Real World: Cancun, and I half watched the episode last week, but I think I might get hooked this week. I'm hoping anyway. I think the girl Emily is HOT! (I think she spells it emiliee or somethin crazy. damn her momma is
So I've been fielding offers from a lot of girls lately. It's weird being full court pressed. Hopefully one really pans out into something great. at least for the summer. Oh, so claire tagged photos of us from this past year. She also sent me text messages, but I def did not respond. I don't have time for girls like her. She's one of those, pay attention to me because it makes me feel good girls. I actually started to care about her and really dig her and she tried to play me like a fool. well FUCK her. How does it feel to be chasin a brotha bItch. lol! (not gonna lie though, I really wanted to beat. She had long legs and smooth skin, I mean her skin was sooooo SMOOOTH) However.......I'm going to start chasing good ones. Oh, I need to call Paris. She is great, and I've been blowing her off. I suck. But my boy is coming back in town today! Hell yeah. let the games begin.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Michael Jackson. RIP, the man was incredible. I loved his music. I grew up listening to all his music. Even today his music still stands up. Nobody cares about records that the Big Tymers made, Juvenile, Jewel, Sisqo, people who were huge, but their shit doesn't Hold up. Hell I loved his last record, the one with butterlflies. That record still gets me. Not to mention, PYT, Thriller, Billie Jean, and his countless other hits. I loved what Jeremy Piven said, "If it wasn't for Mike, Justin Timberlake would be serving fries in the valley." I'm one of the few who thinks he didn't do anything to those kids. He didn't have much of a childhool , so he wanted to share what he missed with kids. He was just a black man that they tried to tear down, and are still trying to tear down even in death. Michael was great. He is a legend. And I will continue to enjoy his music. He revolutionized the game. Well done sir, your legeacy will live on. ...
And my man. Steve "Air" McNair. He was a good dude, and a great player. The thing I remember most about Steve was that he almost never practiced. Just about every week he was too beaten and battered to run drills, but he would be out there every sunday. If he played with the rules they have now who knows the numbers he would have put up. Now if you touch the quarterback you'll get a $25,000 fine. But he was so smart, and such an excellent passer that that his scrambling abilities were just the cherry on top. The man was just a Leader and a Winner. I was SO scared that he was going to rip my rams of their superbowl in 99. But I grew to love him because he was just SO GOOD. I'm glad he won an MVP, and I will retire the jersey I bought into my hall of fame. I loved playing with Steve, and it was an honor to have him onmy fantasy team. roo rooooo!
Whoever plays Jessica is tight though. I mean, she has grown on me and is def a super cutie. I'm guessing they aren't done filming the show yet, so they're trying to give post a little extra time to finish up the final bells and whistles. Anyway, I love the show. But there are some weird ass vampire culture people that take this shit seriously. It's a little creepy. I mean, I love true blood, but I know that it's not real. These people that pretend to be vampires are wackos. Which begs the question, do people see me that way:-O.
How about my girl Kelly Clarkson joanin on Perex Hilton. Now this shit is good. i love Kelly, she's so down to earth. And in this interview she pretty much confirms that I still have a shot with her because she's not a lesbian. Hell yeah! Check it out, skip to 8:15ish to see the part about perez, but the whole interview is pretty good.
Also looking forward to this flick I've been waiting on for the longest. It's got my girl Tina, and Jennifer Garner. Holla. I'll def be there on the first day! Check it. and I'm out
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
I've been putting off blogging for a while, but it's time to jump back in. Recently, I've fallen for Alexa Chung. I don't even know how it happened. I think it's her accent, Cuz she's cute, but she's not that cute, and her personality is the kind that makes yuou want to hang out with her. She seems cool to just chill with. Unlike Megan Foxbot who i'm pretty sure is so hot she hates people . I feel like she thinks she's wasting her hottness on humans and secretly desires to woo other space creatures. Just a thought.
Am I crazy for really wanting to read Kanye's new book???? I'm not going to buy it (duh), but I am going to read all 52 bullet-pointed pages in my local border's. here's a sample.
Thank you, and you're welcome
Here's a hater's review: hilarious
Kanye West seems mildly amused that these things called "words" can actually be written down and combined into interesting groups called "phrases" or sometimes even "sentences.
Anyway, Nurse Jackie is new. I like it. I'm starting to be a showtime groupie. Although they cancelled brotherhood and I was never into that. The new season of weeds has been kinda terrible. Nancy can't let me down two seasons in a row right? Plus how weird is it that her sister Jill was abruptly out of the season never to be heard from again? hmmm....My fantasy teams are doing well. I'm wheeling and dealing and the second half will be crazy. Just wait. Ok, this is a good start. coming back tmw...
Monday, June 1, 2009
Well LeBron is out. Ugh, I feel like the Magic are either really good or the cavs suck. We'll find out on thursday though. I see shaq getting on board early, when he tweeted "I'm a go wit da Lake show."
Spencer apologizing was really cool. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt and hopefully he meant it.
Stephanie pounding that arrowhead. good for her.
"You're supposed to look like a godess princess amazing...on a wedding day" - Heidi, that is exactly what she said. i did not edit that gibberish
You dont bedazzle a wedding dress. Lauren showed. a miracle by the proudcers at mtv. this is so staged. kristen shows up...yeah right. why do they keep saying her full name too??? because she's taking over on the hills.
Lo's the best...You match (talking about LC and Kristen, did anyone else catch braless Krsiten jiggling down the aisle. It was A-MAZ-ING!!!)
i'm following her on twitter -
The real world Cancun = Key West....I hope not. That. sucked!
Audrina deadpanned when Kristen mentioned Justin-Bobby.
100% fake = kristen catching the bouquet.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
I have to say. I thought it was a foregone conclusion. It looked like Kobe and Lebron would cruise to the finals, but the Nuggets and Magic made it to the conference finals for a reason. I'm still mad that Lebron lost. How you gon' let Lebron go off for 49 and NOT knock down a jumper, Delonte "Better have my Donuts" west? It doesn't make sense. Plus Dwight howard fouled out. I'm not mad at LBJ for passing the ball. That what he does. I'm mad at Anderson for letting Lewis hit a three in his face. So what if he goes in and shoots a 2. At home you play for overtime. On the road you go for the win. That's what happened. But I still love these commercials. I hope Lebron makes it. I'm not gonna be upset if the nuggets handle Kobe and co.
Speaking of the Nuggets...ok, So it's half now in the Lakers game and I thought after their crushing first loss they would roll over. And they did, but apparently the CROWD PLEAZA didn't get the memo. Huge 11 points, and chauncey with the nice off the back on Kobe. I like it. You could almost see the "fuck chauncey" on Kobe's face in that halftime interview.
Despite what I want to see though. I am 100% certain that David Stern will do everything in his power to make sure that the Kobe Lebron Final happens. He got Lakers-Celts last year so the man can do anything.
My updates. RIP Dolla. Paris is back in town for a bit! My comedy group's show might not suck this quarter. And I am very very busy. Just gotta keep grinding. And i needs me a job quick! Ahhhh, so many loose ends. it'll come tigether though. OH!! Lost finale. Crazy good. It doesn't make up for a sucky season, but I like the fact that I have no idea where they're going from here. Also, Nancy Botwin and Sookie Stackhouse will be coming to a TV near you in less than a month. yes! Ahhh yes, lets enjoy a picture of Nancy fuckin up.....
Saturday, April 18, 2009
I'm excited about the playoffs. I feel like Lebron is about to dominate. I really wanna do some kind of presentation on king James, but I don't know how I can make that fly in a class like "the history of nuclear weapons." Also a girl said NeWk-Cular the other day. Is she for real?
Oh man, Heuristics girl. There's some girl in my comm class who brought up some shit about Heuristics, but I will only refer to her as heuristics girl. Sorry I'm slumping right now, I'm kinda like Papi. I just need to get back into the groove of things. But now that I think about it. Let's talk about david Ortiz. Papi, I fucking HATE YOUR GUTS YOU LAZY SLUT. he's like 4-50 to start the year and a few days ago he got caught trying to steal second. STEAL! Hit the fucking ball! I can't even be uspet anymore. Please just start producing..ugh, school sucks. I'm going to post pics/videos, and then hopefully get these regular updates together.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
But Baseball is back! Actually I'm more excited about fantasy baseball. I should be, I do have 4, yes count em, FOUR teams to manage. The way I see it I can't lose em all.
My roommate sucks
This Kobe commercial is sick.
And I think I'm gonna finish editing this in the morning....I'm sleepy
Ok so I need to talk about GaGa. Yes Lady Gaga is taking over my life. That eyepatch zipper thing she wore on American Idol sealed the deal. Plus her album is amazing. Top to bottom, It takes a lot of hard work to not just quit after you make a couple good singles. To not coast and save her stuff for another album was tight. I like her style. I read in blender that she likes to "have unprotected sex with" her music. Well whatever it is Gaga , It's working. You are a weird, seriously, like a martian, but in a weezy kind of way. As much as I love Xtina. She can piss off. Because she left the scene and you swooped n her spot.
Also growing on me is Keri Hilson. She's got a few tight songs on her album. I still however, have no idea why people like that turnin me on song. Although, wayne delivers with a solid verse, as usual...but other than that I'm not feelin the song or the beat. Knock you down rocks. So there ya go. I'm back and hopefully deliving blah on a more regular basis. We shall see.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Is Heidi really gonna crash the boat party?
Oh how I missed you Spencer. Where's the beard????? He's onto Heidi. The cameras are on, girls night must, mean LC is involved. Kudos. And grow that flesh colored beard. I miss it.
!!!!!!!!!! Heidi coming on the boat is sooooo Weird. Record screeeeeeeeech! Throw her overboard!!!! Please, I bet Lo would. She's just bitchy enough. I wish she'd go with me to formal. That would be tight. Anyway. *Commercial*
Me time! My advisor is meeting with me tmw! She's the 50 yr old milf. But she seems excited. It was so weird seeing her the other day. It was like running into a girl you told you like her only to have her run into you at the most awkward time the next day. So yeah. It was weird. But it's all good now.
AND WE'RE BACK*
Which one of you invited Heidi? And I know it wasn't Lo. Wow. Steph, party of one.
Whoa, Lo and Heidi look very similar. I guess that's why they're the two girls I have a crush on. Hmmm.
I so wanna Kelly Cutrone Heidi right now. Are you ok? Cuz I mean damn the girl is thin!
Heidi: I wanna get off the boat! *Uh, you shoulda thought of that before you crashed LC's BOAT PARTY. Um, the shit set sail like 10 mins ago bitch! (I mean boo, you know I love yo crazy ass)
ANOTHER COMMERCIAL. Ok, well, Damn, I missed DWTS Tonight. Yes, I have a thing for Shawn Johnson. So what!? She's tight. But I'm more invested in DAG. I want him to win so badly. Funniest DWTS comment goes to Weezy for this. (skip to 5 minutes)
BTW, Lawrence sucks.
ok, don't hate cuz Cam hated on you. Spencer you are not tough. Yikes. Spencer throwing on a dude. It's only because that dude was a pretty boy. He would not have thrown on a brother.
Bingo Heidi. He did it because he WAS flirting with the bartender. Is she having an epiphany! Somebody call T-Pain.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! A FULL HOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!
Friday, April 3, 2009
Oh yeah, So he's basically standing behind me pretending to do something. It's like, go away.
But back to my NBA rant.
FUCK. J.J. just scored. looks like shit just got real.
So I've just recently gotten into Gossip Girl, and Dollhouse. I'm not recommending these shows just yet. But they don't make me want to shoot myself so we'll see how it goes.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Whoa, a tracy cold open. Very funny. I see you John Cena making a cameo.
Ohhh, cena was promoting his new film 12 rounds. Looks like a good trailer but it'll prolly suck.
Why did they recycle that dumb ass eating diaper video.
Brain Fellow's! Yeah, it's crazy seeing new cast members interact with old tracy character's. He starts off a little shaky but settles back into brian. I love the uppity cow. wow tracy.
Astronaut Jones was weak. They shouldn't have andy samburg. Put casey wilson in a dress so I can stare at her tig ole bitties. duh.
oh, abby elliot is kinda cute.
Kelly rocked out. I always love her live though. She is thick. But blue is her color. I hope she's not preggers.
Weekend Update---- Bill Hader does a great Malkovich. Bear-NARD!
Kristen Wiig as Barbie is HOT. HOT VOICE. wowee
Suppressex... Eh? If tracy wasn't in it, I wouldn't have laughed. He is a serious crutch for them.
I really liked High IQ. I see you Kristen Wiig. (SNL's weekly crutch) and again abby looked really cute in that egg costume. I thought Keenan made a good harry potter as well. That sketch started slow but actually worked. His cadence and reading of the lines is so bizzare though. Maybe he does that to keep the spontanaeity.
Kelly's back. I Do Not Hook Up! Wait, that's her 2nd single. I guess they're really gonna make sure they get her off the schneid. I'm cool with that though. Ok, I'm gonna closely examine her stomach region....I'm am lovin the fact that she's thick though! Thicky THICK GIRL!!!
Rocket Dog!! It worked.
Great Episode Tracy and Kelly. Probably one of the best of the season!
Friday, March 13, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
So I can't believe I'm watching this show. It's all Liz's fault. She got me hooked on this blog that posts the most hilarious recaps.
you really should check it out. But now on to this week. Whitney has feeling!?!?!?! What???? Yeah, she actually cried. And for the first time I started to think that maybe Jay actually has feelings for whitney. Probably not, but maybe. And how did MTV manage to get them, not a gig mind you, but a WEST COAST TOUR! Cmon. But It made for good television so more power to you MTV. Note: how funny was it to watch Olivia awkwardly ummm her way through that presentation. and umm the faces that all the people at the meeting made ummm. yeah she deserved it.
Anyway, i have a date on wednesday! it should be fun. but she's going to berlin on the 20th..boooo. i'm out
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Sometimes its like are you really sitting there watching me in my boxers
And I slowly turn and …wow. Unbelievable. My roommate watches me in the morning. ewww.
The City/ Valentines day
Is reggie really analyizng the dunk contest. I was gong along with it until reggie started talking. Because reggie is thin on analysis ANYWAY. So get him talking about a dunk contest and it's like Jessica simpson to explain the stimulus package. Sidenote: I can’t believe she’s sucking tony romo’s dick. Some guys have all the luck.
Why is rudy trying to do a dunk he cant do. *my man from desperate housewives.
My bad rudy. You showed me.
12 foot rim. NBA got what they wanted. Dwight vs. nate. This is Rigged! Am i the only one.
Proof, kryptonite. Nba orchestrated it.
This was so obviously rigged. You have not duped me david stern.
“I got the championship back to new York city.” shut up nate. you keep thinkin thats the championship nigga. Last I checked you guys have 21 wins. the last two are the hardest, you don't wanna lose 60.
If Dwight doesn’t allow him to dunk over him. He doesn’t win. End of story.
Monday, February 9, 2009
The L word was great this week. (Max!) No way...It's a show that honestly every week I feel like I'm watching the pinnacle of television. That's why I want to work for showtime, but def not intern, they don't pay any money. This brotha is tryna get PAID!!! (Eh eh, i'm so paid) fuck akon.
Anyway, Wayne got his Grammy's. Four to be exact. One off the Kraus and Allison bullshit that stole wayne's final grammy for album of the year. Yeah, those old fuckers weren't gonna let wayne get away with that one. I'm happy for him though. And he did a great job performing "Tie My Hands."
Well here's to hoping the rest of February 9th goes according to plan. Namaste. and Good luck.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
The Pro Bowl. Larry Fitzgerald. Or as eagles fans call him "The assailant" is dominating today. The man is a beast and I'm proud to have had him on my fantasy team this year. I think it's gonna be insanely difficult to draft him this upcoming year though. Ok, so what sucks is the fact that I can't play an exhibition game as the pro bowl teams in madden. That's so wack. What happened to the classic teams and NFL europe teams or even the teams like Tiburon or the Mummies?
When does Fantasy Baseball Start? OMG!! A-AROID!!! He carried my team to victory last year. But If I have a shot at the first pick, do I use it on a guy who is extremely soft. Can he take the New York pressure, plus EVERYONE talking about how he's tainted. It looked like he almost cried during that Katie Couric interview so It's not lookin to good for ya boy.
I just got this new tina fey poster! It's great. She's great. I got it as an early burfday present for myself. Also, I'm going to meet with this guy about sneaking me into NBC for the summer on thursday. I gotta use all my networking skills if I'm gonna pull this one off.
Finally saw "Saw V." And I must say, it was pretty good. Well, It was better than I expected good. Because saw III was terrible and saw IV was garbage. Like that NBA LIVE 08 with Gilbert on the cover when he tricked me into believing that it was the best game he ever played. I honestly don't believe that nigga ever even played that garbage once. Nobody at EA did. They finished and turned it in like I turn in papers that I've just finished before lecture. Oh also watched Eagle Eye, and It wasn't bad...it was cool, I guess, I dunno, ummm yeahhhh.
Still to see - Lakeview Terrace ( got it, watchng Sam tonight), Vicky Cristina Bracelona (show me dem tigglebitties), Slumdog Millionaire (I think people have ruined it for me, just like with Superbad,, don't lose yo damn mind and start talking about how a movie changed your life. Because you still know you always say shit like, "I'm not a racist, some of my best friends are black." Gran Torino (that old nigga is hard) and of course Benjamin Button ( I have to wonder If Brad is really, I mean really cool with all those kids, or if pussy got him hooked.) I ain't mad at ya Brad.
Grammy's Tonight!! Li weezy Let's go! The Katie Couric Interview wasn't bad. ...oh yeah, so my birthday is tmw. I feel like its gonna suck. I'm 23 and what have I accomplished? Lebron has a gold medal!!!
Friday, February 6, 2009
-LOST & L word Break-
So LOST is kinda starting to fall into that trap that I had predicted. Season 5 is in a holding pattern, kinda just circling around the airport until the real story picks up in season 6. FUCK.
L word. Why does every episode start with someone saying..."I am Gonna Kill Jenny Schecter!"
I get it. We all get it. They all wanna "kill" Jenny. I think she'll end up killing herself which makes me sick because it's such a cop out.
So what else, there's this girl kinda jocking me but i'm so used to getting clowned that i'm not even gonna go after it. why? I'd rather not get attached to some chick, start to wanna bone her, get really awkward, then add another girl to my fuck up list.
And my birthday is coming up, which means it'll be real awkward when nobody wishes me a happy birthday. I have like 2 friends here and they'll both be off campus, and i bet nobody in the sketch group knows. ugh.
And my midterm just Kobe dunked on me today. But at least its a midterm. See you in the finals Kobe.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
2. SHOtime is back. The L word is incredible. They have cheesy overarching structure, but the content is still is as good as ever. Nikki was cheesy as fuck though. I think I've figured out the big mystery, and Its just not fitting. I don't like that SHOwtime! decided to spoil me. I think they could have told the story without doing it like that. Anyway, Secret Diary and Tara have been entertaining as well. The edge goes to Secret Diary though
3. Elliot 2 from scrubs. She was in something else, but ole girl is finnnnneeeeee. Aziz is great too. SY-Sy-Sy- SYphillis!
4. LOST!!! My entire world revolves around Wednesday's Now. I'm trying to get my class changed to a different night because it makes me five minutes late for LOST. It's too much I know.
5. Things are starting to fall in line for me. Except Paris is going back. But Ryley is talking to me, and this other girl (who has a bf) wants to be friends, which is great! Plus stanford Melo is single now. Well see what happens.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Man, I would really like to get some ass right now. I think I'm in the dreaded settle mode. If I were a facebook junkie I'd set my looking for to "anything i can get." I saw this chick that was not cute. AT ALL. and I was trying to think of scenarios where I wouldn't hit it. fail. I mean even though she looks like that weird evil rabbit from the simpsons I'd still beat. Yeah, it's like that. I think right now I might even take a run at that katelynn chick from the real world....
My roommate just let the most horrible SBD fart rip. Fuckin asshole. and I even went halfies with him on a futon. *BIG MISTAKE*
Hey Gil. Ummm, remember that 111Million dollar contract you signed. yeah remember that million dollar pool you built. yeah. remember how you backed JOHN McCAIN! yeah, I ain't forgot shit nigga. And you wanna complain about taxes. Barack should tax your shit. You don't play nigga, you need to get a job at McDonald's or something. you know, contribute to society like the rest of us. they thought you were a zero because you've played 0 minutes in the last two regular seasons. dickwipe. that said, when this nigga is right, he's on point.
I skipped a meeting tonight. I just couldn't do it. Almost everyone in that group sucks. almost, there's like 6 cool people out of 20. the rest fuckin suck. like jabbar.
And this pretty much sums up the rams season.....
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
I've been gone, trying to get ass and failing miserably can bring a guy down. But i'm back and ready to start 09!
1. The Eagles. Although Sal Palantonio was talking about Westbrook being hurt. But he's always hurt. Just beat the card, we'll worry about it later. There's 2 weeks til the Superbowl.
2. I'd totally smash Chris McKendry. Real Talk
3. Kelly Clarkson's new single is fire! (the name is stupid though) I can't wait til she releases her album on ST. Patty's day. Actually I'll probably end up bootlegging it first. And she's lookin cute too.
4. When is TP-4 coming out? I love that song skin. Razzy got me hooked on it. I swear kells better in the chocolate factory right now finishing that shit.
5. I need lost to come back! ASAP. The previews are freakin me out MAN!!!
6. The golden globes were crazy. Tina looked absolutely gorgeous and 30 rock cleaned up, but how about anna. Her portrayal of sookie stackhouse was amazing. Hopefully this gets people on board. Oh....still not impressed with Madmen.
7. What is wrong with Heroes???? Everything. Just Everything. But I've boiled it down into a few key points. My Thesis: The characters make these annoying "holier than thou" speeches, vow to destory one another.. and then change their core motivaytions at the stroke of the writers pen.
8. Liz Hurley fell off. What happened. She was so fine in the 90s. And she's still just as cute. It doesn't make any sense.9. Battlestar comes back this Friday. I love those face of the enemy webisodes, they've crushed the lost webisodes by far.
10. The L Word, United States of Tara, and Secret Diary all make their return this Sunday!! I want shane so bad it hurts. I wish she was doing the spin-off.
11. My Tony Parker is back, but she has mono and she's going back to France in 2 weeks. All I wanna do is show her how incredible she is, but she's also my best friend. Ugh, and kissing her would make me deathly ill. i'm good. But when i'm with her and I leave, i miss her...A lot. I just like being around her, even if we aren't doing anything or saying a word. Do I L her??? I think so...maybe thats why my relationships don't work out. It's like my body knows im already taken. whoa!! snap out of it dude
12. My Dad stole my Ipod charger. Bastard, now I can't upload that Kelly Clarkson Commercial or the lil Weezy G commercials. Damn.