Monday, April 26, 2010

Noah thinks Derrick Rose is a "Special Guy"

If ya'll watched basketball today then you know exactly what I'm talking about. Joakim Noah was interviewed about Derrick Rose and what he means to the team when it took an incredibly awkward turn. It was one of those 15 second clip everyone ignores while you wait for them to put the game back on the screen. But he managed to fuck this one ALL the way up. He was like, (and i'm paraphrasing) Derrick's so good, (no longer paraphrasing) "he's really a special guy." I was shocked. O_o All I could think was GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY (not that there's anything wrong with that)....I had this exchange w/ my friend Christy.

Me: Joakim Noah might be gay. He was talkin bout D. Rose saying he was a "special guy." Plus he looks like a fruity light skinned dude.

Christy: haha Joakim isnt gay...well i dont think he is. he just didnt know what to say lol

Me: I think youre right. it just came out soundin mad suspect.

Christy: lol yeah he did look confused too..u could tell by the look on his face that he didnt know where that statement may go next lol

Anyway, this past week has been jam packed with things so I gotta get right to it.

NFL Draft:
I'm happy my rams picked Bradford. I wish Locker would have come out early, but Bradford may be the savior we need. And I would like to thank Denver for the WTF moment of the draft. Let me make one thing clear, I thought Tebow would go in the first round. I just thought the dummy to do it would be Al Davis. If Tebow was black he would have to be a RB. end of discussion. (Sidenote: I've seen the pictures of tebow's girlfriend. He's fuckin. Next. I have a suspicion that Tebow may be a vampire as he most definitely glamoured Josh McDaniels into making that pic. Like how Bill talked that officer into giving him his gun. yeahhh....) Also ESPN was trying too hard to stir the pot when they kept calling the ealges second round pick the "Donovan McNabb" pick. I mean, I get it. That's the pick they got for donovan mcnabb. But they made it sound like the guy will forever be linked to McNabb, because that's the pick they got for him. Uhh, no ESPN. That's not how it works. Does anyone even remember the guy's name now?

It was also cool to see Toby Gerhardt get drafted. Although, I'm not sippin the kool-aid on this pick. Toby is cool and all BUT...he is a FB. plain and simple, if he thinks he's an every down HB he's trippin. (Also, dude doesn't look like a football player, he looks like a cartoon character. I saw him on campus today, Flintstone lookin ass nigga ---> Yabba-Dabba Doo!!!!) He's not fast enough, and at best he could be a Lendale White. In college he was bigger than everyone and just knocked people over. I don't think he's gonna have the same amount of success playing brian urlacher twice a year, or against any NFLers as they're much Bigger, Faster, and Stronger than anyone he's played against before. Best of luck, but all this talk about if he was black....Dude should be happy more people aren't mentioning the fact that there was another white running back taken in the second round a couple of years ago. BRIAN LEONARD. yuuuup! <--drake voice

Matty from Big Brother 9 apparently beat his pregnant girlfriend. Big surprise (+ rolling my eyes). He mentally assaulted Natalie (right) in the BB house even though she would constantly dome him up. He's just a terrible human being. Which is surprising as normally guys with tatoos like that who like making the "myspace face" for for photos are generally well balanced. Well, speaking of terrible human beings...this guy....

Philly fan vomits on a little girl. (intentionally) Premeditated Barfing. Really? Thank you philly fan. Hurling on a young girl. Too bad you did so on an undercover cops daughter. Now we can add to the list that already includes racist, santa hating, and disgustingly overexpecting.

David Ortiz.
Are you for real? You thought you could sneak down to the Dominican and rip Jay-Z's club name. If there's one thing lazy sluts aren't, it's being good at sneaking/stealing. You can see them a mile, or 2,000 away. and even if you try to claim you weren't ripping Jay_Z then what exactly did your 40-40 stand for. You haven't come close to stealing 40 bases ever. And you probably won't come close to hitting 40 homers ever again. Never has anyone fallen as hard or as fast as Big papi. It's sad really. Great nickname, great guy, bad player. I also heard that the red sox may release him before the all-star break...stay tuned.
Wade vs. Celtics. So D-Wade evened up the series. But he had to score nearly 50 to do it. Miami is basically making his decision to opt out for him. D-Wade should never be out after the first round of the playoffs. It's not good for the fans, and it's not good for the NBA. I think he and Lebron will end up on the same team together. *fingers crossed*

Saturday, April 17, 2010

True Blood is Near and Playoff Basketball

Is anyone else as hyped as I am for season 3 of TRUE BLOOD??? I hate when it gets close to the start of a new season of a show because i get more impatient. I could have waited 7 months no prob, but be having anxiety attacks in the last week. Sidenote: Is it wrong that I'm more excited for his than I am for graduation which will be earlier that day?

























The NBA Playoffs started today too. Shaq is Back. And Lebron beat Derrek Rose and the bulls to go up 1-0. There are a few series I'm excited about this year. I think Heat/Celtics, Lakers/Thunder and Cavs/Bulls will be the best series. But I'm also interested in the outcome of the Mavs/Spurs series. Dallas is basically playing the best 7 seed ever. It just speaks to how deep the West is. The absolute clunker series that no one will watch include Nuggets/Jazz, and Bucks/Hawks. Just 48 minutes of garbage. Regardless, I'm excited. It's just too bad the commercials from this year are no where near as good as the one's in years past.

Last Year: Amazing and Inspiring



This Year: Just gets the job done. Nothing more. Lame

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Date Night and People at Stanford


So what if my male friend asked me to go see Date Night with him on Saturday Night? Yeah I went, and you know what I enjoyed it. Not as much as I would have hoped, but it had some funny moments. The weird thing is, I am totally addicted to Tina Fey (her face and pictures are all over this blog) but I had feeling I wasn't going to like this movie. I never watch trailers for movies I'm going to see because I feel like they give away the best jokes. Well, I probably should have watched this trailer because I was mad confused. When I heard about the movie a couple of years ago, they were trying to spice up their marriage by being swingers. *NOT AT ALL WHAT THE MOVIE IS ABOUT NOW* However, I thought the movie spent too much time trying to weave in a narrative than tell jokes. Maybe I'm in the minority here, but if you're making a comedy-comedy, then there's not need to go out of your way to try and make a solid story. It's different if your goal is to have a drama with comedic moments. I dunno. I'm weird. Go figure...

Anyway, on to people at Stanford that annoy me

People who spoil shit: Don't tell me what's going to happen in 24 or LOST. I'll watch the show instead. Hmm, what's better, me watching the show and finding out, or YOU telling me??? I had this conversation with a friend the other day about 24. Don't worry, I'm not going to spoil you.

Friend: Hey Darius guess what
Me: huh?
Friend: Character X isn't actually dead and will be returning to the show. How cool is that?
Me: BLANK STARE
Friend: What???? I didn't tell you how character X was coming back?

Wack Girls: There's this one girl who I have dubbed "Waste of Tits" because she is an absolutely terrible person with perfect tits. It's a shame really.

Then there are the girls who let you buy them shit, and take them to dinner, and go all out of your way for them and they eventually hit you with the "oh! I thought you knew we were just friends." NO BITCH. FRIENDS PAY FOR THEIR OWN FOOD!

Slow Walkers are pretty terrible too. I'm writing a song about them. Anyway, just been warming up and posting blogs for the first time in a while. I'll be back into game shape soon. Until then, enjoy this video from my boy T-Pain and Andy Samberg






Saturday, April 10, 2010

Donovan McNabb a Redskin, Lost

Wow! I gotta say, I saw it coming, but I didn't see this coming. The Redskins!?!?! Like wtf??? for real. Although it is a lot better than playing for Al Davis. So there's that. But basically Philly is admitting they're rebuilding, and I honestly don't think they're any better than a 5 win team now. McCoy is not a full time back, as a true FB Leonard Weaver beat him out for carries down the stretch. McNabb carried that team last year. And while they may have gotten dismantled by the cowboys, that was a testament to their D that could not stop Tony Romo. The D had been terrible all season, but Dallas knew them too well, and knew exactly how to pick them apart. They made Tony Romo look like Joe Montana 2 weeks in a row. And then sure enough, a week later, Minnesota made him look like Tony Banks. If the D were up to par, they would have brought back McNabb to make another run at the SuperBowl. But they knew next year the D wasn't going to be any better, and they weren't going to sign him to an extension, so they pulled the plug.

I think it's interesting that he'll only have to stay in Washington for one season, and then he can presumably go to Minnesota or Arizona. (That's if there's no lockout) I do however like that the Eagles gave him a choice form the offers they had on the table. So while they certainly didn't want to face him twice a year, they figured they owed the franchise leader in touchdown passes, and yards, and passer rating something. It's a business, but it's always personal, and you could tell it stung as McNabb quipped he "never knew 33 was old." McNabb's my dude, so I'm pullin for him, and I hope the skins make the playoffs. On a hilarious note. The onion published an article about him being traded. Mad funny.

So LOST Yeahhh, I dunno man. It seems like every episode = "we're not safe here, let's go stand over there." All they do is stand around and talk about how confused they are. Note to future showrunners: this does not make for good/satisfying television. Plus these flash sideways are taking a very predictable turn. I just hope they move the plot. I'm not one that needs every episode to be action packed, BUT YOU MUST MOVE THE PLOT ALONG. Other than that, why did I watch the episode. So you could drop a few hints here and there. Naw dawg, Lost (even in it's final season) is proving to be a show that is much better for DVD than it is for television. But what can ya do? 4 more episodes until the finale, So i guess I best be enjoying it.