Friday, March 25, 2011

When Men and Mountains Meet

I've been away for a while so it'll take me a minute to knock off the rust, but let's get into it. I'm back because one of my favorite shows just ended. I'm talking about Big Love. I love this show. It's familiar and foreign at the same time. They're a family dealing with issues that every family deals with, the only exception is that the main character (Bill) has three wives. The writing is excellent and acting is incredible. I urge anyone that's a fan of television and character development to watch this series from the beginning. As far as finales go, I thought this one was perfect. Without giving anything away, I'll admit that I got a little misty eyed by the way that every moment of the show added to the resolution. I can't wait to go back and watch it from the beginning. Big Love was that good. Not to mention the intro is phenomenal (seasons 1-3)

(Seasons 4-5)

So I'm into the third round of Charlie Sheen's search for an intern. Apparently they managed to narrow a field of 75,000+ down to about 250. The worst part is a guy that works in my office got featured on the news because he made it to round 3 as well. Whatever, I'm not happy with making it to the sweet 250. I'm all about WINNING the whole damn thing. Leggo!

Fantasy baseball starts tomorrow. I took last year off becasue there was no way I was playing another year in the roto league. So I took my ball and went home until they decided to change the rules and make it head to head. As Bart Scott would say, CANT WAIT!

Well I was in the bathroom the other day, standing at the urinal when I noticed there was a dude in the stall next to me. AWKWARD. There are so many things wrong with this scenario. 1. Who takes a shit in the middle stall? Am I right!? Everybody knows, you take a shit in the stall furthest from the door. End of discussion. 2. You've gotta be an asshole to take a dump in the middle stall. Because what if somebody comes in and needs to take a shit. Then what....

Anyway, back to the point of this story. I gotta pee bad, so I know it's gonna take a second. All of a sudden this guy flushes the toilet. And this ain't a courtesy flush. This is a "I'm bout to make things awkward when we both meet at the sink" flush. So I kick it into high gear, and hit that ever so critical wiggle before I zip up and sprint to the sink.

Now I hear what sounds like the pants coming up, and I'm frantically trying to wash my hands and get paper towels before he gets out. Keep in mind, this is a small bathroom. We will have to make eye contact if I don't get out of there. So I turn off the sink try to get a paper towel...THE MUTHAFUCKA JAMS...Time is of tha *fuckin* Essence, and the muthafucka jams.... so while I'm trying pull that shit out of the dispenser, I hear the door opening and I just say fuck it..I bounce. Wet hands and all. I think he may have seen the back of my head. I dunno, but I do know that that guy is a jerk. He's supposed to wait. Some people just have 0 awareness.