Friday, December 30, 2011

My Favorite Things of 2011 Part 1

I'm not gonna front and pretend like 2011 was my year.  I'm living at home.  My year, it was not.  However, 2011 introduced me to a bevy of wonderful things and I've decided to compile them here.  In no particular order, these are the things I loved the most in 2011.

Everything Must Go (2010) - Great movie.  I love Will Ferrell playing serious, but still being hilarious.  His facial expressions in this movie are classic.  But my favorite part of this movie is the bond Ferrell's character forms with the kid Kenny.  The two are such an unlikely duo, and yet they form a friendship that comes off as entirely genuinely because of their incredibly on screen chemistry.  Watch this movie! 

Breaking Bad (Season 4) -Probably the best season of any show I’ve seen start to finish.  All of the pieces fit so well together.  Even when it seemed like things weren’t going anywhere each episode gave me a feeling of completeness, and then the payoff down the home stretch was phenomenal.  If you haven’t watched this, get caught up of Netflix, and watch the best television has to offer.   I’ve never watched an actor and thought to myself, wow, he has to win the golden globe until this season's episode "Crawl Space."


Big Brother - I love this show.  I really need to finish filling out my application, but this season was a lot of fun.  I got a little too worked up, and fell in love with Danielle.  Still hate Kalia, Rachel, and Brendan though.  The only thing that would have made this season better is if Dick would have stuck around.

Born This Way - Gaga’s 3rd Album saw her musical style continue to evolve.  It’s definitely a deviation from her first two efforts, and it probably alienated the people who only wanted to hear poker face 2.0 or a Bad Romance "spinoff."  I'm glad she changed it up, and I loved the album.  Highway Unicorn, Judas, Bloody Mary, Born This Way, Heavy Metal Lover, and You & I couldn't be more different, and they all rocked.  If you're curious, I wrote about Gaga's evolution earlier this year. 

Entourage finale - I'll never understand why it became cool to hate entourage.  I thought the finale was perfect though.  It didn't need to be anything other than just another episode.  A lot of people wanted something mind blowing, but I'm strongly entrenched in the camp that the Seinfeld finale approach is how you end a show.  You don't need to put a tidy bow on everything.  Just put all your characters in a believable spot and say goodbye to the viewer.  I had so much fun spending time with the guys, and Entourage will always be the fastest 30 minutes in television to me.

Super 8 -  JJ Abrams just makes great movies.  Out of all the films I saw this year I was most probably the most impressed by this one.  Mainly because it's tough to make a great PG-13 movie.  You don't have the crutches or free reign of an R rated movie.  I was just completely immersed from start to finish.  Great movie.


Friendzone - I just started watching this show.  I think it’s fun for me because I can completely identify with the  guys and girls trapped in the friendzone.  I’m looking to go friendzone to endzone with a couple of the girls I’m besties with, so it’s great when it works out for these kids.  However, my guiltiest of guilty pleasures is watching people who have no shot pour their hearts out.  I’m a terrible person I know.  This guy poured his heart out to this girl (pictured left) AFTER he got THAT hug.  He ain't even gettin titties pressed against his chest!! Cmon son!

Marc Maron's WTF podcast - I'm actually listening to this as I write this post.  Marc Maron is a comedian who I had never heard of until he made an appearance on Conan promoting his podcast.  I listened to the Amy Poehler one and I was hooked.  Some standouts for me this year included his interviews with Jimmy Fallon, Conan, Bryan Cranstan, and Jon Hamm.   You should definitely give it a listen, or at least check for when one of your favorite performers is on. I hope he gets Tina Fey, which leads me nicely into my next favorite thing.

Bossypants - Tina Fey finally penned a book about her life and it’s brilliant.  All the sharp witticisms you’d expect from the former head writer of SNL and current star/creator of 30 rock.  Tina talks about her childhood, her fame, work, and social interactions.  It’s a great read, and I found myself literally laughing out loud.

C Milli's cooking dance - LET THE BOY COOK! 

Black Swan - The only movie that I’ve ever been jealous I didn’t write.  It’s a psychological thriller and without ruining anything, it gave me chills when it ended.  The score is fantastic, and Natalie played the hell out of this role and took home the Academy Award for best actress.  I can’t say enough about this movie.  If you haven’t seen it, run to your nearest redbox and get it right now!  It's worth buying if you're a dvd collector.

Katy Perry's titties - These bad boys had a big year.  I believe they’re 34 DDs.  The more I think about it, there's really only one word that fully describes them in my mind.  And Katy is always putting them out there is dangerous situations.  Her tits need an agent, cuz they're hot right now.  Katy had a huge 2011 btw, becoming the first artists since Michael Jackson to have 5 number one hits on an album (California Girls, Teenage Dream, E.T.,  Firework, Last Friday Night)  and I’m fucking pissed that I missed her concert here in St. Louis.  Good news though.  Apparently Katy and Russell are headed towards divorce. He fuckin sucks anyway so good for her.

That bikini top is begging for a friendly quit!

Beyonce's performance of "Love on Top" at the VMAs - I can’t stop listening to Love on top now.  Beyonce always kills at the VMAs, and she did it again.  I love that Adele is mouthing the words, I love Kanye and gaga next to each other jamming out the song, I love the dancers and light work.  It was one of those moments that you can’t help but get sucked in.  Beyonce is the best.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas!!

The NBA is back!!!  Shaq is joining the NBA on TNT too, so here's a present!

Monday, December 19, 2011

Sunday TV/ Football Rewind

A quick look at Sunday.  And Dexter and Homeland Spoilers so you can skip over that if you're not caught up.

Jimmy Fallon, hosted Saturday Night Live this past weekend, which technically ended on Sunday morning so that's how I'm justifying this, and he killed it.  I mean, dude ripped the stage.  I really liked his songs.  And especially the opening monologue.  Standouts include the 1920s Holiday party, the cold open (with rachel dratch and poehler), the Tebow sketch, the Weekend Update Joke Off (with Amy and Tina), and the Christmas treat song with Sanz, Kattan, and Tracy.  Anyway,  here's a showcase of Jimmy's impression skills.  The man is a genius, and he just seems like a good dude.  Overall, great ep, check it out on hulu.

So Tebow Lost.  Which is great until you realize that it didn't really matter if he won or lost.  He just had to keep it close.   And as it turns out, 18 points is just enough for supporters to pretend like Tebow inspired the Broncos to lose close.  Ain't that some shit.  I guess haters gonna hate, and supporters are gonna talk about how great he played.  *However*, I loved that 29 yard sack Tebow at the end of the game.  Made me feel alive.  Anyway, the networks aren't going to stop covering Tebow because my friend sent me an article, and since the Pats-Broncos game got a 19.2 it appears the people have spoken.  I'm part of the problem too though, because I tuned in to hate. It's the reason why Glee will never go off the air, and there will be more singing and judging shows for years to come.  If we watch it, they'll put it on air.    
The spike was awesome.  Probably because it was so unexpected.  It'd be like if Elmo told someone to eat a dick.

Dexter is over.  And honestly, what was even the point of this past season?  They wasted 9 episodes ripping off fight club and fooling no one.  I used to give the writers the benefit of the doubt, but that's over.  I mean I heard everything from how it would be the darkest, it wasn't.  How it would make Dexter examine religion, it didn't.  Seriously, the religious theme was so poorly implemented that it was largely distracting.  Mos Def's Brother Sam was a breath of fresh air, but unfortunately he didn't make it too far along.  All this season really did was finally, FINALLY, get us to the point where Deb realizes Dexter is a killer.  And that was all I really wanted (end of post, #2).  And not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but I think that's a revelation that should be brought out in mid-season rather than being tacked on to the end of a season.  It felt like they thought they needed a cliffhanger to save the season more than anything.  Like a hail mary almost.  But this plot will get plenty of attention next year, so season 7 should bring Dexter back into my good graces.

The Homeland finale wasn't bad, but ultimately it was disappointing because my main concern with homeland was how could the series go beyond one season.  And judging from the finale, the writers don't really know that either.  It feels like Homeland is going to go into typical network hour long drama territory and refuse to kill off characters even when they would greatly serve the plot.  A lot of people think Heroes might have survived had it not become so attached to it's season 1 cast, and restarted storyline with new characters.  They didn't and ultimately the show failed spectacularly.  I think Homeland could have learned from this example, but with Brody sticking around another season and not blowing himself up, it seems like the show will toy with ideas, but ultimately never have the teeth to do anything impactful or brave.  The series has had some strong moments though so I'mma give em 4 more episodes before I decide if i'm out.  Oh but my favorite moment from the finale, and funniest, was Walker petting that lady on the head.  At that, I did laugh out loud.

The Dark Knight Rises Full Trailer

Ok, this got me so hype that I almost threw a brick through my neighbor's window.  Can't wait til this summer!

Quick Thoughts
- Love how that dude from Dancing With The Stars got a part in the movie.
- Anne Hathaway is sexy as fuckkkkk.
- Bane seems like he's "cold as ice!" (dave chappelle voice)
- Fuck the Seahawks! lol!
- Joseph Gordon-Levitt is my n*gga!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Kristen Wiig is Doing The Most

Kristen Wiig is killing the game right now.  I mean besides Bridesmaids, which she co-wrote and starred in, she's one of the most consistently funny people in Hollywood.   Her versatility is amazing, she can play neurotic, she can play straight, she can play silly, and she can do it all in a span of 90 minutes.  Kristen Wiig is literally doing the most.  And I wanted to take some time out to to give Kristen some blog shine, because it's easy to be one of those people doin too much. *cough* Skip Bayless *cough*  btw, I am convinced that Tim Tebow will be Skip Bayless' waterloo.

But back to Kristen, she carries the show.  You should watch the gem above for an example of her genius.  A lot of SNL isn't funny, in fact, a lot of time's it's painful to watch their horrible sketches.  (Fortunately I don't have to deal with that anymore thanks to my DVR)  But even when the material is weak, Kristen adds a funny face, or a quirky voice, and it works.  It's eerily reminiscent of the immensely talented Amy Poehler's last two seasons on SNL when she carried the show in a Post Fey and Tracy Morgan era.  Which makes me think Wiig, much like Poehler will bolt for another vehicle to display her many talents.  I don't see her sticking around past this season, and when she does bolt SNL may be in a world of trouble.  Or it could be next woman up.  Who knows, but props to Kristen, and good for her being named one of Time magazine's "People Who Mattered."  She's earned it.

*Quick note:  If you're unfamiliar with the genius of Amy Poehler then you should buy this DVD or add it to your nextflix queue.  It's worth every penny. 

Update: More Kristen Wiig appreciation, aka part 2.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Adios Albert

When it comes down to it, Albert Pujols should be a Cardinal.  There's no other way around it.  The Cardinals allegedly offered Albert 10 years 220, while the Angels offered 10 years 254.  Putting the Deidre revelations aside.  (Deidre said that they were offered 5 years 130 first, insulted then offered a nine year deal with an option 10.  She said had they actually been offered the guaranteed version of 10 years 220, then Albert would still be a Card)  Regardless, it never should have come to that. For the last 6 years Albert has made roughly 14 million.  He wanted to make 25 mil per.  PAY THE MAN!  He's only the best hitter in baseball.  If that's what he wants to be paid you pay him.  Because again, he is the best player is baseball.  Not to mention he's far more valuable to the Cardinals organization than he is to any other team because he's going to go down as one of the game's greatest players.  Can you imagine if they Yankees had let Jeter go?  Jeter wouldn't have made nearly as much money with any other team, but the Yanks ponied up b/c Jeter is the face of the franchise.  He's Mr. Yankee.  He's the contemporary Yankee legend.  From Ruth, Gehrig, Mantle, Berra, to name a few and now Jeter.

The Cardinals had a chance to do that with Pujols, but they blew it.  Over what?  3 million dollars a year.  The projected payroll is supposed to be 110 million this year.  You mean to tell me the cards can't go to 121?  It's going to cripple the franchise financially to spend 11 million more than they wanted to.  A hot dog and a soda costs 12 dollars, but you're struggling to pay bills.  Cmon son.  If you can show me a statement that says the cards only made 11 million last year then I'll leave it alone.  But just think about how much money they made off squirrel shirts alone!?!? I refuse to buy into the Cardinal spin that they couldn't afford it.  Being able to put a statue in front of busch stadium  is so much more valuable than a few million dollars.  It's much more valuable than overpaying a man towards the end of his career. A career in which he made 200,000 his first year, 600 his second and 900 his 3rd.  His totals from those years go: 37 HRs, 130 RBIs, .329 BA / 34 HRs, 127 RBIs, .314 BA / 43 HRs, 127 RBIs, .359 BA. That's how these deals work.  You compensate a man for when he was underpaid.  They took care of Holiday, they took care of Lohse, but they inexplicably didn't take care of the franchise?  Unbelievable.  I'd almost have more respect for the Cards if they would have been honest and said, "you know what, we're not gonna sign him.  He costs too much, and it's been a great 11 years."  The thing is, winning the world series cost us pujols because it gave the owners a honeymoon period.  People are still high off this world series and not going to be as critical of the franchise.  It's why they hired Matheny, a man with no coaching on his resume, to manage the team.  They could have had a stud in francona, but saving the 4 million was more important to them.

Last note is for Cardinals fans.  There are too many people acting like Albert aged 5 years overnight.  Even in a down year the man had 37 home runs, and a .299 average. AND he missed time with a fractured wrist.  Now I'm hearing about how he wasn't that good, and he's a jerk, and we're better with out him.  First, he was that good.  2nd, he is a jerk.  Probably even more than Barry Bonds.  When I took the pic below I was less than ten feet away from him and every other Cardinal on the field talked to me and my friends except Albert.  He didn't even acknowledge use.  Like he was too good and couldn't be bothered.  Dude, it's BP, chill.  But whatevs.  And 3rd, you're not better when you lose the best hitter in baseball and get nothing in return.  period. 
It's crazy that the Cardinals kept keeping LaRussa, the one man I wanted gone the most, and then showed Albert the door, the one guy I didn't want us to lose. 
Ultimately, the Cardinals are run as a business.  They'll be fine and people will pay 8 dollars for beers and go to games and cheer on their squad.  The Cards are my franchise so I'll root for them too, but I'm not going to be bitter towards Albert, because had the franchise wanted to keep him they would have.